It seems like that my thoughts scurry around the most when its bed time. They say an idle mind is the devils playground. But tonight I'm gonna look at it as God's blueprint. Ideas to try and set fourth into motion. Emotions that no longer need to go fourth. A map back to myself because the last one I had honestly had me living in the land of the lost. Sometimes its hard to do something when you have been on habitual hiatus of doing not a damn thing. I give myself and others that same line though, "I'm trying". When I know damn well... I'm not. Its kinda like the lie a person tells over and over so they can make themselves believe it. Kinda like the use of "I love you". I don't want to look at the man in the mirror and then say what I see, because the eyes lie just as much as the mouth does. But the heart tells it like it is. I want to be in a room full of people, and still be able to see myself. Amongst the greats, the beautiful, the well-rounded... The happy. I know now that to be able to see those things it starts with self. I need to ask my heart, "heart? What makes you beautiful? What makes you well-rounded? What makes you happy?" And I want my heart to answer me, "You".
